I make numerous promises to myself and set goals but I cannot seem to keep them. I don’t understand. I can keep my commitments to others but when it comes to keeping them for me, I fail miserably. What can I do to reach my goals and keep my promises?
In my coaching practice I see people who are successful and moving forward in their lives. But they are not content. As the pain of their discontent increases their desire to change also increases causing them to be motivated to take action! However, every coaching client must first confirm her convictions. I currently have a coaching client who has decided she needs to adopt an exercise program and nutrition plan that will put her in better shape and health. She claims she has tried many programs yet cannot keep them up. One of the first things that she must do is believe that it will be best for her to eat properly and exercise on a regular basis. She must also believe that the reward is to eat healthy. Many people say they “deserve” that cheesecake or ice cream or to skip a day or two at the gym. Actually, they “deserve” to eat well and keep their body in good shape. It’s a matter of changing our mind, thus, changing our behavior.
Believing that your goals and promises kept will bring contentment is paramount! If you don’t believe it, you won’t do it. Case in point; many people know that drinking and driving can have dire consequences. However, only those who also believe it will not do it. What we know and what we believe are often different. We act on what we believe. Therefore, if you are not keeping your promise to yourself or meeting your goals it may very well be because you don’t believe it will make a difference in your life.
- You must write it down. Allowing the promises and goals to run around in your head is ineffective. Writing them down including dates, times, schedules, etc., and signing it like a contract to yourself makes it more real.
- Next, you must fake it until you make it. In other words, act on your goals and promises until you see that they do make a difference. Then keeping them will become part of your life.
- When you reach a milestone in your plan, Celebrate!!! Reward yourself with something that you love, a bubble bath, a round of golf, your favorite movie.
- Reaching your goals also takes determination and accountability. Choose an accountability partner that will encourage you and help you hold firm to your plan.
When you see results, you will want to continue to see them and will no longer need someone to hold you accountable. That is lifelong change.